The Kingfisher

April 9, 2021


She came complaining that she was not
satisfied in her marriage
She said she married as a virgin and
expected her husband to make a slut out
of her but her husband didn’t
Her husband had sex with her and she
got pregnant and had children but they
didn’t have the kind of sex she had always
read about or watched on television
The one where the girl will be twisted
with passion with her tongue hanging
out of her mouth as she pants like a
deer or a labrador
She said she had found it puzzling that
her husband didn’t do it hard to the
point where her waist was paining her
and her parts purring for pleasure
She said out of a possible 10, the pleasure
her husband gave her was a 5
She said she was made to do most of
the work on their marital bed
Their default sex position was she
being on top and sometimes she would
rub herself against his laps and all
so that she can get there
She found it frustrating and unfulfilling
She said she had always started
cheating on him
An old friend bumped into her in a
supermarket and they exchanged
He kept in touch through small talks
and all and it got so intimate that
he had asked her to come and pay
him a visit
She said the only reason she didn’t
go was because she was a believer
Her husband’s faithfulness, love, care,
ability to provide for her responsibly
and his other great qualities faded
into oblivion as soon as the possibility
of a breathless smashing was
presented to her
He asked her if she had discussed how
she felt with her husband, she said
she will do so within the next few days
when her husband returned home from
the site of their village in the project
She said she didn’t mention it because
she didn’t want to seem like an ingrate
She was a full housewife by choice
Her husband set up a laundry business
for her which she manages
She manages the laundry at her discretion
She spends most of her time-keeping
the house, the children, and preparing
meals for the children with the help
of a cook
She said when her husband got a cook
she was livid with anger
To her, he wanted to render her redundant
or perhaps was implying that her cooking
was no longer satisfactory
She said that gave her concern but in
the long run she came to realize that
her husband just wanted to make she
was not overwhelmed with work
When her husband argued that the job
was more for the benefit than her ego
she caved in
After a few days, she realized that
getting a cook made a lot of sense
The cook could cook a lot of things
and she did it professionally too
Her children ate better and she also
more time on her hands
She was able to spend more time
with her friends and family, watch
TV and live her dream life
Her husband bought her two cars
A luxury two-door Benz and a Toyota
She was living the life
On a good day, she shouldn’t have
any complaint at all but the sex
thing was really eating her up
She waited until her husband had
rested on the very day he returned
home from his trip
They got talking
She was giving him updates on the
children and other things that went
on while he was away
Suddenly she said “Darling, do you
know I really wish I was fifteen years
old again?”
Her husband asked her why
She said “I had the opportunity to
lose my virginity at that age but i was
miss prim and proper and i told the
guy off
Now I regret not taking that opportunity
I would have had earth-shattering sex
with seven to ten guys before I got
married and found myself stuck with
a desire that had refused to be
Perhaps it was her tone of voice,
perhaps it was her choice of words
She noticed that her husband’s
demeanor went cold
She had planned to say more but
she swallowed the rest
She didn’t want to poke the bear
too much
Later as laid on the bed preparing
to sleep
She had anticipated that they
would have sex as they usually
do whenever he returned from a
long trip
As soon as she got on top of him,
he crossed his arms
She had totally forgotten what
transpired earlier in the sitting
Her husband was not one to keep
a grudge
She tried again
He pushed her aside
He got up, dressed up, and walked
out of the room
The next thing she heard was his
car starting and well, he was gone…
It was the first time in their fourteen
years of marriage
Her husband was a believer, a lover
a friend and a responsible man
He had forgiven her worse offenses
with just a smile
She sat fuming
What could have come over him?
He returned home the next day
by 9 AM
He said “I have kept you in a life
of luxury to the point where your
idleness has become an issue.
If you work as hard as I do every day,
sex will not be the permanent desire
you have not found satisfaction for
in your life”
Since the day I have married you, did
you ever hear me complain?
I took you as a gift from God and I
treated you with dignity and respect
You had food, you had shelter, you
had house helps waiting on you,
you were given cars and treated like
Do i ever deny you sex?
Have i ever denied you sex?
No matter how hard I worked, when
you have sexual need I force my eyes
awake to ensure you are satisfied
but you expect me to put my back
into it while you lay down purring
like a cat.
I will teach you a lesson you will
never forget!!”
He walked upstairs to their room,
picked his briefcase and walked
out of the house
By that time she understood she
had stepped on the cobra’s tail
She called his mother to report
She called his siblings too
She had never seen her husband
behave that way before
Everybody told her to calm down
He didn’t return home that night
She called him, he picked and ranted
“I have spoilt you, you delinquent
ingrate. I will withdraw everything i
provided for you by my sweat. You
will work and labour and toil too
You will come to appreciate the
things you have taken for granted
When you put your back into work,
your libido will settle down!”
He rang off
Her husband was never one to
take kindly to criticism
She knew that about him
It was why he worked so hard to
ensure he was blameless by nobody
when it came to caring and providing
for his family
She had not seen him go that mad
since the time they were dating when
she said he didn’t know how to kiss
He took it poorly and it almost led
to their breakup
It was a button she shouldn’t have
She called their pastor by the third
When the pastor called her back, he
said her husband was already out of
the country
He was in Italy, brokering a deal for
a client
Later that day the cook and the drivers
They said they had been redeployed
The housemaids also left
They were all called by the head of
the Human resources Manager
of her husband’s company
Her husband had rented a penthouse
apartment and all the helps were moved
She was stripped of everything apart
from the house and her children
Her husband sent her a note to resume
work at the laundry as manager and
to take care of her need and that of
the home from her salary
It was debasing, denigrating, disparaging,
derogatory, dehumanizing
It made her angry
She refused to do it
That month ended, she got nothing
in form of upkeep, salary or stipend
The house was a money gobbler
Internet bill was almost 300K per month
Electricity and water bills were 200K
She didn’t have enough to fuel the
car and buy foodstuff
She was reduced to tears
How could her husband be that
She called the pastor again
The pastor told her she should have
taken up the job her husband offered
There was no point being obstinate
She had goofed and the wise thing to
do was stoop to conquer
She sent her husband a mesasage
“I am sorry for talking the way I
did, I have learned my lesson, please
forgive me and come back home
I will do the job and earn a living
to support you.
I now know and appreciate how
much you labour over us as a family.
I am sorry again.
Please come back home.
I have missed you”
Her husband did not reply
She got home and told the children
to expect their father that night
She had told them he traveled so
that she would be spared the blush
of having to explain what was going
By 9 pm that night, he returned home
She didn’t hear the car drive into the
She had dozed off on the sofa
Her children screamed “Daddy, Daddy”
She opened her eyes and there he
Looking at her with a sheepish smile
She stood up, walked up to him
and laid her head on his chest.
Finally, she cried!
He held her and cried too
They had missed each other so much
The teacher and his student
He told her he was sorry
She nodded and cried some more
They dragged each other to bed
and made love feverishly
She was no longer timing his
strokes and waiting for an
She was just glad she had him
back in her arms

PS: This event happened in Lagos
in 2016
Things changed for the better
The cook didn’t return and only
one housemaid returned
She took up the job offer and
started running the laundry diligently
The laundry now has five branches
in Lagos and one in Abeokuta
Their sex life was sex life
They had times they laughed over
and times they took serious as
the mood dictated
She said that period of separation
was hell for her but she learned a
vital lesson from it which had helped
her tremendously
He said he did everything he did for
her and he was glad she appreciated










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